Just Shut Up About Communication!

Just Shut Up About Communication!

Communication: it’s the buzzword round our work. Got to share your ideas appropriately. And I’m sick of it.

having a full on attack of verbal diarrhoea

I know communication was the name of the game when people discovered the power of jargon.  You used to be able to say, “You need to communicate that to me” and people seemed to make out they knew what that meant. I still don’t.

“Talk less and communicate more”. I mean, what does that mean? Use sign language or something?

Now, if you mistake talking with someone for ‘quality communication’ you could get in trouble. Could get the sack. From your job. Or, someone could just run out from behind a desk and hand you a sack. Probably made from hessian (that’s burlap for people who don’t say hessian).

But that’s not communicating. You can talk all day and while the time away shooting the breeze, chewing the cud, or even having a full on attack of verbal diarrhoea over a cup of coffee. That’s awkward. Gets messy.

It gets your goat going.

But when your boss spots you having a yaffle over the desk partition, it’s odds on they’ll have a go at you. “Failing to use situational awareness… Not bothering with actionable analytics… or jacking your ideation and skipping snackable content” . It gets your goat going. Like a red rag to a bull, it’s dangerous. And it’s hard to see the point of it if your colour blind.

Communication is stopping people from enjoying each other’s company and it’s giving me the heebies, because it’s all wrong.

Better off saying less and just smiling and nodding if they’re going be all hoity toity about it. Just make a vee shape with your thumb and forefinger and stick it under your chin. Reckon it works wonders. They can’t tick you off for listening can they? “Hey you! Stop listening to people!” No, you’re on safe ground with that one.

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