15 Unique Birthday Wishes When You need Them

15 Unique Birthday Wishes When You need Them

Nobody thinks they need a few distinctly unique birthday wishes. Not on your radar. Then suddenly a birthday comes up and you're scrambling for something clever to say. Something original. How unique? Well, let’s just say, I’d be surprised if your brother (who knows everything) knows any of them.

Enjoy your birthday. But remember this. Too many will kill you!”

And, hand on heart, each has been handpicked by my blind, tin-eared friend Cyril. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you…

  1. “Now you have now come of age, may your liver grow to touch the sky and your entrails be forever sweet.”  (soon to be forgotten Molgardian Proverb)
  2. “Happy birthday to you, to your camels and you. May your journeys be jolly, with there be no sand in your shoes.”
  3. “Congratulations on becoming older, wrinklier, and a bit more tired and worn. I am sorry this is such an unfortunate event, but happy birthday anyway...”
  4. “Nobody deserves more attention than you on this birthday. For you are the reason for all of the trouble it has taken for us to be here.”
  5. “May this birthday be the best birthday you’ll ever have. Which is another way of saying ‘You better enjoy yourself because this is as good as gets.’”
  6. “May the sheep of the fields bleat in your honor and the cows moo in majestic harmony, knowing it is your birthday today.” 
  7. “May the beauty of your birthday exceed the vocal majesty of laughing hyenas, grunting pigs, and cackling chickens.”.
  8. "Enjoy your birthday. But remember this. Too many will kill you!"
  9. "They say that time is the best healer though it’s also true that time is a terrible beautician. Happy Birthday!
  10. “What? Your birthday again! This is becoming an expensive habit. Worse still, we’re running out of candles. And you’re becoming a fire risk. Well, what can I say but… Happy Birthday.”
  11. “Oh, what? Oh yes. Happy birthday!”
  12. “Cleave the cake and macerate it with enthusiastic joy! Today of all days is a special kind of day because you were born for us to eat cake!”
  13. The amazing thing about your birthday is that I know exactly when it is, but every time it surprises me! Happy birthday from your regularly surprised friend.”
  14. “If I could make every day your birthday I would. But I’m worried you’d get sick of eating so much cake. So let’s keep this one day special and wish you every happiness for the rest. Happy birthday.”
  15. “The older you get the more you light up my life (which is understandable with all of those candles). Happy birthday!”

Told you they’d be unique birthday wishes. And they weren’t even that bad. Good one, Cyril (he's a legend). 

Today’s Pisces Love Horoscope Revealed!

Today’s Pisces Love Horoscope Revealed!

36 Birthday Quotes

36 Birthday Quotes

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