Cheer Up It Gets Worse

Cheer Up It Gets Worse

Being cheerful is an agreeable quality. Mostly, people appreciate a smile and sunny disposition. But the way some company keep it, you’d think you better be cheery or else.

The positive at all costs brigade want it that way. Believing you are nothing without a sparkling attitude, they insist the only electricity worth having has got to be positive.

That's an electrical joke.

Shocking, isn't it?

But life isn’t always a jolly romp. People die. Not normally at the supermarket when you've got your trolley. But it happens.

Lovers break up. People get hurt, lose jobs, get into trouble, go broke, and lose their health (sometimes, all at once). For a challenge.

Then they feel grief. Got to respect that kind of grief. Give it a title.

"Hello Mr Grief."  Or, "Morning Ms Grief. Nice day for it. Come and feel sad over here."

Just steamrolling over people’s pain with shallow sayings isn't good enough. Might be well meaning. But makes people pests. Grief pests.

And it takes time to get over it. Days for some. Years for others.

Attempting to jolly people along, saying:

  1. “Try a happy face for a change”
  2. “ Come on, get a grip” or,
  3. “Well your husband did die, but why don't you snap out of it?”

is like slapping someone in the face with a cold, wet fish and expecting them to smile in reply. Not good. Not even nice for the fish.

Plus, most men try helping by finding solutions. Fix it up. So, the answer to losing a partner would be getting you hooked up with someone else as quickly as possible. Stops you crying. Solves the problem.

Meanwhile,  the constant positivity mob do a little shuffle here. Dodge a bit there,. Jump up and down and wave their arms in the air. Job done, high five, smile, and “Presto!” Grief's gone. You can be happy now.

Whether it's just inane, misguided, or cruelly insensitive is up to you.  But, for me, a positive attitude is more three hail Marys and a strong cup of tea.

I reckon it's about a kind of inner buoyancy (not the vest, just the feeling).

With a readiness to experience life and encounter people as they are, you don’t need to push people. Nor do you need to make them smile on cue.

The I'm going heal you guy brandishing an almighty smile might seem appealing. But, if he lacks compassion, and just pretends to listen, he is dead in the water. Just a con artist flashing a set of ultra white teeth.

Life's all about quality not spit and polish. There's got to be something in us that's greater than blood and guts. Something good inside, whether your smiling or not. 

So,  full marks for genuine good-natured appeal. Minus one for fake smiles, fake happiness, and a dodgy disposition.

Just keep a wide mile from people who want to make you feel something that's not real for you. If it's not honest and it's not true. So don't waste your time.

 

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