Buckets of Lurv
You need a lot of love. But how we measure it seems a bit weird.
Buckets of love are a strange measure, don’t you reckon? Except to say that it sounds like a lot. Mind you, I can't get the picture out of my mind of all that love sloshing about and spilling all over the carpet. As a container, pails aren’t exactly made for love. Well, unless you're very inventive.
Nor are spades for that matter. Fancy having love in spades? Nobody says love in shovels, but surely love in spades is equally strange.
“Darling, see what's in those spades? That’s how I feel about you”. Reckon that's a touch too agricultural, don't you think?
What about spoons? That kind of makes sense. Putting another ever lovin’ spoonful down the red lane could well apply to feeding your baby. But it won't work when the kids are grown up.
"Now then sweetie, peetie. Here's a cutsy, wootsy loving spoonful of lovely apple mousse. Just for you! Open wide. Yes! Good boy! Very, very good boy."
"Thank you Mother. Can you make it quick? I've got an important meeting to attend in just under an hour and as vice president, I need to confirm the details."
No wonder some people tried oodles. What’s an oodle? Well, according to the Merriam Webster Dick & Harry (I mean, 'dictionary') it means heaps. From 1867 onwards, the word “oodles” began being used to describe anything in large amount.
This was obviously a desperate act to measure big stuff. Even oodles of love?
Rhyming poets hate these expressions. You’ve only got: poodles, noodles, doodles, boodles and caboodles to go with it. Which – let’s face it – isn't going to end well.
“I love you oodles when you're covered in noodles"? Guess that's true for some couples. But, what if you're gluten intolerant?
Like I said. Not good. True you can work around the gluten thing. Buy special noodles. But that's just oodles wasted on pasta.
Given all the facts, probably the best thing you can do is keep it simple. When it comes to love, just say "a lot."
Most people are happy to have it.