Terms and Conditions 

Thank you for visiting happy.fm website.  This is the serious stuff to make sure people know what's what and we all do the right thing. 

In terms of privacy and security, know that posts, comments, and emails are not encrypted (i.e. kept in a very dark and secure crypt with someone's mummy). So, we don't guarantee the security of that kind of content. In other words, don't share secrets about your love life, where you put the key to the front door, or your shoe size in case you want 120 million other people knowing (that the key is in the mailbox, you've got the flutters for the postman, and you're currently between shoe sizes). 

Unless otherwise stated on this website, any third party advertisements and such on this site (which contain links to other sites where goods or services are advertised), are not recommended or endorsed by us. Ditto any goods or services advertised by the third party. The third party advertiser is solely responsible to you for everything they're selling (We just work here and don't even know what some ads are even offering. But Google Adsense promise they'll throw some coins at us in exchange. Horrible really, but we need funds to run this site).

We are not responsible if the info you read on this website is not 100% accurate or complete. Just like when Trivial Pursuit said that the brassiere was invented by Otto Titzling. That was so not true. Nor was Thomas Crapper the man who invented the flushing toilet.

Oh the lies!

So please don’t take it as gospel. You need to get at least 3 copies of facts from different sources. Plus a signed note from either Mum or Dad before you can be sure about anything on the Web.

Just so you know.

Now, when you put stuff on the site, know we might use it again for funny reasons. Like, if you sent through a photo of yourself dressed as a nun biting a kipper… we might use it on the site. Even claim one of us was the nun.

Or, the kipper.

So we might use it for humourous purposes and consider it the property of happy.fm to freely do silly and frivolous things with. Not saying we will. But we could. Of course, we’d normally try to throw your name in (so you can get your 15 seconds of fame). But no guarantees. And, of course, we’d assume in good faith it was your stuff in the first place. Not from a third party (or, any other parties you may have been to recently).

No reproduction of any part of this site may be sold or distributed for financial benefit. No. Nor, shall it be modified or put in any other website or printed text.

Definitely.

You must not use our website logo or do anything to prejudice the rights of happy.fm. In other words, pinching stuff from happy.fm is not allowed. And happy.fm reserves the right to enforce intellectual property rights to the fullest extent of the law (which is very full indeed).

By the way, links to other websites links on the happy.fm website will take you beyond the website to third party websites and happy.fm accepts no responsibility for the content, accuracy, or function of these websites.

At all.

So, if you are unsure, don’t go to them. And if they have any dodgy content, move on. Like your mother used to say, “Don’t hang around toilet doorways because you might catch something bad”

Aren’t mothers so practical?

Now when it comes to photos used on the site, we do our best. We make every reasonable effort to source images that are out of copyright or are free for use because, well, we are on a tight budget and can’t afford to buy stuff. However, if we mistakenly use an image without permission, please let us know pronto so we can quickly remove it (because we get that pro photographers are trying to make a living too).

Naturally, site users are not allowed to do anything on the site that is unlawful, dodgy, worrying, or widely recognised as upsetting. And happy.fm will use its discretion to block users who are doing these kind of things.

So if it’s not on, it’s not on.

Meaning, if your grandma would’ve started rifling around the kitchen looking for her wooden spoon, you know it’s a no no.

That means using this website to defame or libel happy.fm, or other individuals, or using bullying, antisocial, or hateful speech is well out of order.

And in the big scheme of things, be aware that you and happy.fm agree that any controversy or claim arising from the use of this website shall be governed by the laws of Australia (Pitcairn Islanders & Betootans take note!).

If you have any questions or comments relating to this website or these Terms and Conditions, please contact us. We will do our best not to hide behind the bushes or under the far rug near the fireplace, beside the woodpile. But if it’s too tricky, we’ll probably pick a different place to hide. And we’ll ask you to count aloud for a very long time.